Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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