i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
