You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
