Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
