How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
