My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
