Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
