did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
