Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
