yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
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