Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
