Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
