well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
