Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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