The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Randomize
