I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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