walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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