Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
