I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
