i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
