Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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