I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Swine flu. Run for my life!
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize