I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
