I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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