I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
