STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
