By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
