That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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