dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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