Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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