i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
