i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
