do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
