fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
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