those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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