We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Randomize
