Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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