Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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