Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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