For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
