the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
