She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
