Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
