The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
