at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
