I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
