at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
The ass gains better be worth it
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