In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
