he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
