Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
