This girl is more easily done than said...
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
